4 Tips for Making Friends for Kids

Friends and even acquaintances are important to our mental health. Friends increase feelings of happiness and buffer against those feelings of loneliness and social isolation, which are associated with an increased risk of depression. Teaching your child social skills may help them make friends more easily. It’s a skill that they’ll use their entire lives – throughout childhood, the teenage years and adulthood. To help your child build friendship skills, check out these four tips.

1. Coach your child. For some children (and even adults), making friends can be challenging. You can’t make friends for your child, but you can coach them on skills to help make them. Teach them how to introduce themselves to new friends and help them practice through role play chatting with people they’ve just met. Explain the importance of paying attention to others, because friends like good listeners. Ask them what they find hard about making friends so you can help them practice those skills.

2. Provide opportunities for social interaction. Kids can meet potential friends at numerous locations: on a sports team, at clubs, at the library or in community parks. Go to the same location regularly so your child can interact with the same children. One-on-one playdates are also a great way to spend quality time with potential friends.

3. Model good habits. Let your child see you talking and laughing with your own friends and explain how your friendships started and grew. When you meet new people, let your child see you interact with them, and explain what you’re doing. Teach them how to ask someone questions and listen to their answers. Discuss when and how to share some personal details – but not overshare. Encourage them to find common interests, such as activities or sports, that may lead to friendship.

4. Discuss conflict resolution. Conflict arises in even the closest friendships. If your child’s friend plays a game with different rules, it may cause an argument. Help your child understand how to resolve conflicts in age-appropriate ways. Talking about conflict is often the first step. Bring up how you can approach it with your friend. Talk about solutions to the problem, such as sharing, taking turns, compromising or finding creative solutions to tricky problems.

Allison Green
Boston Tutoring Services