4 Screen Time Limit Tips for Parents

Giving kids too much time with screens is easy to do, but not good for kids. Kids need limits on their screen time to protect much needed and ever-decreasing time for imaginative free play—the kind that leads to creativity, social skills, greater self-control, greater emotional regulation, and more. We can set up our environment to help limit screen time by making bedrooms screen-free and limiting our own time using our devices. Make sure you promote screen time alternatives like outside time in your home. Most parents agree on the benefits of limiting time on screens–it’s how to get kids off screens that’s hard.

1. Set limits but invite connection. “I’m going to turn it off, and I’d like to talk about what we can do next time.” You have rules for screen time and you should hold those limits, but you don’t have to do it with harshness, yelling, or mean words. We all make mistakes and your child will certainly break the screen rules sometimes, but that doesn’t mean they are “bad.” Instead invite them to talk about it.

2. Acknowledge your child’s feelings. “I don’t like repeating myself. This is frustrating for both of us.” When we are working on reducing time on screens and you set a limit, your child will naturally feel frustrated. That’s okay. Acknowledge those feelings—it helps your child feel seen and heard, and can lower the emotional temperature in the room.

3. Avoid threats. “If you don’t… I will…” It’s so easy to use tablet time as a threat, but it backfires in the long run. Threats put you in an oppositional position to your child. They make your child resistant to your message. The more you use threats, the more your child resists and resents you. Using power like this makes you lose your influence with your child.

4. Invite cooperation in problem solving. “I know that shows are important to you. Maybe together we can find another way for me to remind you.” How can you both get your needs and your child’s needs met? Maybe you make a screen time chart together, a screen schedule, or have an app for limiting screen time. Screen time can be intricately involved in social issues for kids, so listen to your child’s needs when you problem solve together.

Whether we like it or not, we live in a digital age. Let’s work with our kids to create children’s lifestyles that have a balance of good screen time and everything life offers beyond it.

Allison Green
Boston Tutoring Services